A Sex Filled Weekend

The one thing the new guy is teaching me is how to relax. We spend hours upon hours in bed just holding each other and rubbing each others backs and massaging each other. He likes to cuddle!! We went out with a friend of mine and her boyfriend, which was something new...and then we came back to my house and relaxed. Nothing like some wine and well, we did something I haven't done in a long time...I got stoned! I was never into it as a younger person but I actually really like it. It makes my mind go free. And I giggle and giggle and giggle.

We lied in my bed and he began kissing me and I could feel his cock was hard. We quickly undressed and had some good ass sex. Deep thrusts....very deep and fast and hard....then he likes to cum on me...and I will fingerpaint with his cum all over my body. With the cum on my face, he kissed me and we smooshed the cum all over our faces. It was hot!

Next was my tub. There is nothing like my tub. With romantic music playing, the jets swirling, a bottle of wine, the candles burning, the moonlight shining in....its a recipe for romance. And how hot a person looks in candlelight and the reflection of the water. Our kisses are unexplainable...they are intense, they are deep, they make me melt into his soul. And he feels it too. There are no words to explain our kisses, they are slow and deep yet fast and intense....we kissed for 40 minutes....craziness. And i took pictures of us kissing and you can see the passion...WOW...To my amazement that just from our kisses, in 103 degree temperature, after just having sex less than an hour before---his cock was hard as a rock. And he was shocked too! Just kissing and sucking on my nipples, makes his cock hard. He loves how pointy my nipples get. He tells me over and over that he hasn't ever seen a finer set of nipples.

Getting out of the tub, we collapsed in the bed. And after some giggles and watching tv, I can't help but start playing with his cock again....but he's like nope, its my turn to eat you. The man kills me...he is such a male version of me. He listens to my moans, he listens to my ahhhs and he pays close attention to what makes me get wet and what makes my clit get all engorged and my muscles pulsate. And just like I do with a blow job, he choreographs the perfect pussy eating. He knows a nibble on my clit with some circles with his tongue, some licks, light circles, fast tongue action, slow tongue action. It's a challenge, it's control....and it kills me that he knows just how to make me cum. Oh I love it but he is so smug that I attempt to hold out....and he laughs because he can feel my clit about to explode, he can feel my body shaking....come on baby, let it go....and he goes in for one more nibble and lick of my clit and I explode....a wave of orgasms as my body thrashes on the bed. And then he fucks me again....its mindblowing.

Five times in 15 hours is pretty damn good. But I do have to teach him to make love. He's petrified, a big step but I like it slow and hot too....and he's willing to learn and we've gone 3/4 but its going to take awhile for him to get that slow, hot, orgasmic sex. But he will.

We were in bed till 2:30pm, watching tv, I love Lucy and just talking, cuddling and laughing. We slept two hours the whole night. Our little sexfests are hot. The laughs we have, the things I think only we would find funny--he's got that same warped humor I have so its hysterical.

Our big joke since we met was that every woman his whole life has tried to rein him in, make him more responsible....but he loves to have fun. Our big joke from day one was that there is no woman who would ever get him to sign up for online banking. At 4AM, totally exhausted--I told him it was time...Yes, I was going to get him to sign up for online banking. He was laughing so hard, its like a major commitment for him..lol And so I sent him out in the cold to get his checkbook and we signed him up. at 6AM, I rolled over and cuddled into him as woke him up with a nice blow job to start the morning off right.....but before I went down to his cock, I whispered...good morning Mr. Online banker.....he laughed and got the best bj of his life!

So, I am relaxed. I am okay with us. He hasn't been sitting online and i haven't been on my online either. It's been nice that we are enjoying each other with no other distractions. As he put it.....we fuck until my cock is going to fall off. do you think I even want to think about another woman after our weekends?!? Aaahh, now there's a plan.....keep screwing till he begs me to stop because his cock is going to fall off.

I am enjoying us. Is it perfect? OMG, it is so headed for destruction for soooo many reasons but for now...I am happy and he is too. Yeah! Don't think is my motto and today I am sooooooooo not thinking!

A Shot Of Reality

Mr. Astronaut has been keeping a little distance. His normal banter throughout the day had stopped. He claimed he has a lot going on in his mind. I had a couple of hours today and told him to come over...he couldn't get over. Okay, I am feeling a little distance.

I just want to fuck him. I just want to play. He's not someone I want to get serious with just sexually serious with. Meeting in fun places, last minute, popping in mornings to fuck me before work. However, Once again, a man who thinks he knows it all. Finally I say to him. Okay, what's up? Don't pretend there is nothing. I know you for eight months now and this is a little bullshit lines you are feeding me. Are you not into us anymore?

What do you mean by us? he writes back

"Us? You and me and us fooling around"....and then lighting bolts go off in my head and I am feeling a deja vu again. Another man who is afraid of closeness. Another man who is reading my mind and emotions. Grrrr....and now a rush comes over me. Is this going to be another man who pushes me away everytime HE feels that I am getting too close.

"I have no intention of falling for you. We are just having fun."
"but you will" he answers
Cocky bastard so damn sure I will fall in love with him? "How do you know that you won't fall for me?"
"I won't. I have real control"
Aaaaah...."So if I get close to you...you will run?"
"Definitely" was his reply.

And so I began to laugh to myself. I sure know how to pick them. I sure know how to find every man who is afraid of emotion, closeness, desire. And as you can imagine my head starts to spin.

"You know you are missing out on so much. When I fool around, I jump in with two feet. No expectations of a future just enjoy the high with no walls. that's what makes it so hot. The boundaries and walls are down. Reality is, when its over, it hurts really bad but it hurts whether you give your all or you don't. You just move on. I want the high....I want that high of lust and passion. I am sorry you feel you have to have all those walls."

"I am used to disappointing people. I gotta go. ttyl" he wrote. Wow....here we go. I personally think he is the one who is feeling more and it is scaring him. I am not even in that place. He's a nice guy, I lust him but please..I am not loving him, I am enjoying the sexual contact and the foreplay. If he only knew the connections that I have had. This one hasn't even hit level 2. And I realized now, he stopped talking about threesomes the last few days since we were first together. Maybe he is afraid of the attachment or something?!

My final words, an hour later. "I think we should go back to our original plan. fuck each others brains out, spend two to three hours fulfilling each other and then we can move on". There was no response from him although I know he read it.

So what the hell is going on here?

Now It was His Valentine's Day Treat

FIRST--YES THIS IS US...I LOVE PHOTO FIXING!

Mr. Porsche loves to watch me cum. It gives him so much pleasure to watch each orgasm. But I also love to give him pleasure. Nothing is more desirable than to know that I am pleasing him. after lying down, I tokd him to roll over and I would give him a massage. A combination of deep massage and light tickles. He was in heaven. I massage ever inch of him from his head to his toes (literally). And then I worked my way back up to his ass.....slowly he feels me working up that way and he opens his legs.....I oil up the prostate massager and slowly and gently teasing him until he is ready to feel me insert the massager into his ass. I work it around until i get there and he rolls over.

Here's the thing about the prostate massager, it is hot when you find the right spot. It makes him lose control, giving him a strange sensation that makes him feel like he is going to cum hard and he doesn't. It's little internal orgasms that causes that euphoria. He giggles, losing control is not something he is used to. This feeling, like a little boy with a sheepish grin, he is enjoying it and I am getting wet knowing I am pleasing him, knowing I am controlling the situation.

His cock is huge and I can see his pre-cum at his tip. I try to give him a handjob but its his own technique that can get him off. this is probably the most frustrating thing. Oh, there is no doubt that I can get him hard as a rock, get the pre-cum there but I don't seem to be able to get him over the top. With rubbing his balls and his magic touch...he came and he came hard....the prostate massager rubbing and pressing against his prostate. Moving it around and watching him moan....yes, I managed to give him that Wow...the pinball TILT! He then finally came...I open my mouth as he squirts his cum all over my face, some in my mouth, dripping down my cheek and quite frankly some shooting over my head.

And then we laid there. It was late, we were doing it for over two hours already so there wasn't much time to cuddle. He doesn't love cuddling, he does it for me. He told me he is happy to do it for me because he can see in my face how much I enjoy it. I love the gentleness, I love the holding and closeness, entwined bodies. I am finding out more and more its not many guys thing but if they are willing to do it for me, they are special.

And then I wanted to take a pix of him which turned into an ordeal with us outside, giggling and wrestling...the camera flashing all over getting flashes of light only. A woman had gotten out of her car and she was laughing at us, enjoying our little scene..running around the car, him grabbing me and the camera just flashing away. She actually stopped to watch us and she had that sheepish grin on her face. That look a person has when they are remembering some flashback in their past that brought her that fun, free romance.

We left and I was sad. Yes, sad because now I wouldn't see him for almost three weeks. Sad because my Valentine's day was over. This was all I was getting this year. Don't get me wrong, I guess its better than being with someone you have fallen out of love with, there won't be an awkwardness on the day, a twisting in my stomach but it would be nice to have someone especially since I won't have the children for the weekend.

The Devil's Elf- Spreading the Ashley Madison Secret

Yes, the underground world of Ashley Madison. A secret place that most married people do not know exists. A double life with a seductive side. So hot, so exciting...yet we walk around in the real world and no one knows we are a member of this secret society. Makes you think, how many people do you know are members of OTHER secret societies that we just don't know about. A newscaster gets murdered in is apartment and was found to be soliciting 16 year olds on Facebooks. Yikes....not the way you want to leave this world.

So should I feel guilty that I tell people about a secret society that gives me so much pleasure! I mean lets face it....if it wasn't for Ashley Madison and the secret married but looking world, if I didn't find that having an extramarital affair was so damn hot and fulfilling, I would be miserable now. I have learned so much about myself and my body. I have found sinful joy...sinful lust and most importantly hot, hot, did I say super hot sex!

I would never know the joy of orgasming until your body is in bliss. I would never know the sensation of a blindfold and a lover who can do me in so many different position that I am amazed there is even that many positions. I have tried anal sex and loved it. I have tried whipped cream, chocolate pudding, pop rocks and numerous other items. I have felt lustful, passionate sex as well as slow, intense sex.....I have met lots of people and have even advanced my career.....lol

My point?! I have one friend who is going wild on there, literally screwing about six guys. I worry about her safety, I do not want to be responsible for that. I also just introduced a friend from childhood to the secret society. A boy that I knew when I was 7! His marriage is really bad and he was telling me and I was biting my tongue and not saying anything and after three weeks of chatting, I finally said--you should check out Ashley Madison. He has now joined and has two meetings next week. Why do I feel responsible? Why do I feel like I am helping spread the devil's message? Like the devil's elf! I guess I am so happy with Ashley, I want others who are miserable to find this special lustful place!

Today I got an email from one of the guys I have been chatting with. We are going to go slow and be friends? He confessed this morning that the past three days he has looked at my picture and masturbated...my oh my! I asked him..... was I good? What a bizarre feeling to know you are sleeping and someone is looking at your pix and jerking off. Hmmmm.....gotta think how I feel about that...

Well today is another day...you know my theory, leave yesterday behind. And I am glad I left yesterday behind, I was in a bad place. Working hard to stay positive today....I love Fridays. It's my day off. Well its technically my day off but I have never taken the day off. But it feels good to feel like you are catching up on the week (even though I am working just as hard)...hmm..something isn't right about that.

Enjoy the day!!!!!!!