Hitting a Wall....

No doubt, I have been in a real funky place. No desire to check Ashley Madison, no desire to write back to frogs....I am in a real slump. A think its a combination of the work mounting up and feeling....it's probably time. Spoke with Mr. Divorce Attorney...amazing how we have been friends for so many years and except for two little trysts, that was it. He keeps pursuing me at least every other week. Now I know he can't be my lawyer...ethical thing "I can't want to fuck my client". "The day your hot mouth touched my lips and then my cock...I couldn't represent you". I didn't know they had that in the lawyers' manual of ethics....lol

He did agree to help me fill out the required papers until I get my shit together and decide who my lawyer is going to be. Quite frankly, if the hubby can't afford a lawyer then what happens? I retain one for $8,000 and then what?

Last night, he was screaming and carrying on like a lunatic about something with my son. My help is threatening to leave because of the way he carries on and she thinks he even scares my other children with the screaming.

I know I am in a real funk because I cancelled on Mr. Porsche today. Oh I rescheduled for tomorrow but its not definite but today, I just want to crawl back into bed and stay in my dreams.

I got a Blackberry yesterday! Actually adding to my chaos. I have no fucking idea how to work the damn thing. And with all the emails coming in, my son put some chime on....crap...this thing is driving me insane.....ding, ding, ding....every damm second....for work, I got already 58 emails...imagine how crazy the sounds were driving me. I complained to Porsche that I couldn't stand it....sweetheart that he is, he called his son and he told me how to shut off the dinging...LOL He's good like that....always looking out to take care of me....

So, thanks for all your concerns...I am alive...just stuck in a funk. hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.....xoxoxo