Today was a rollercoaster of emotions....both work and personal. On a professional basis, I can be....well...tough. When I have a passion for something, a drive....it can overwhelm people...and today I did just that. Long story but she's not realizing the magnitude of what could be involved and I wanted to make her look great. Oh well.....a rough day at work (Thankfully my bosses backed me and see what I am trying to do and why. Rrrrrrrrr.....I find women so hard to work with sometimes. The independent, confident ones...I have no problem and get a long great with them. I think I scare others from a professional basis. I know I can be a whirlwind at times but thats what I am about....LOL
Long Distance Lover has been amazing. He is so passionate, so sexy and so open. I am loving being so open with him. I am loving making him feel good. Most men get scared of emotion...he isn't...he loves it and I love telling him how special he is. sigh....it's frustrating that I have to wait so long to see him. But I have gone over the meeting in my head a million times.....no expectations...I just want to feel his arms around me. No pressure.....I just want to take my hand and rub his cheek and trace his face with my fingers so I can study it and remember each detail. I love the ride up....I hope it continues. Scarily all my walls have seemed to fallen...I am quite exposed right now emotionally and its a little scary. I just can't get enough of him...he's intoxicating..
Feeling emotionally drained tonight....I went to the convenience store to get some milk. Dressed in a black tank top and khaki shorts...no makeup, my hair in a big hair clip and in thongs...I didn't look horrendous...but it is certainly not one of my better looks. I know the guy behind the counter for years. Tonight he looked at me and I smiled and said hi!
He looked at me and said...I know this is forward but you are so sexy. You are my kind of woman. I blushed and said oh please I look horrible....he said, I am 40..I know what I like..you come in here a couple of times a week and you make my heart smile when I see you.
That was the nicest thing. It wasn't a come on the way he said it. It was just a really sweet and honest remark that made me feel so good. Thank you...I said to him. You made me smile tonight too....And I walked out.
This made me realize...it's the little things that can change your whole day..your whole perspective. It's not always something major you do...but an unsolicted smile, a nice comment...can make the world of difference.
So I'm off to bed tonight....at peace but drained.
Sweet Wet Dreams!
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