The Eagles Lyin Eyes

Tonight as I sit here with a glass of wine, the Eagles Lyin Eyes comes on the radio. I can't help but feel a connection with that song. Yes, that's every girls dream.....white picket fence, a couple of kids, a dog, a loving marriage, and a decent life. How sad when the love is no longer in the marriage. How sad when you can't communicate with your spouse...

Tonight,I am at peace. I'm sure the wine is helping. Writing this blog has been a huge benefit for me emotionally. In some ways, it has been my savior. You all have been there with me on this rollercoaster of life. The emails that you've sent to make me smile when I am down....and I love when I can help you as well.

The internet amazes me. The way you can get to know someone who is so many miles away. Now I am not just talking about the phone and cybersex (come on, I am philosophical tonight). I am talking about some of the friends I have made as well. Yes, I have non sexual friends that I have made here.....in fact, many of you have never crossed the line and I guess you read my blog to see what its like from a female perspective.

I look back to the two years and I am amazed at how far I have come. In some ways, I have grown tremendously as a person. I am much more confidant with my sexuality, much more independent and even happier. When I entered this blog....scarily to say...I was desperate. There was no light at the end of the tunnel.

Where am I headed? I am not exactly sure. I had hoped at this point there would have been a happy ending to this blog. But that's okay...ironically because of this blog and my friends I've met---I have learned that I may never meet Mr. Married Prince Charming AND that is okay. I am actually okay with that and am discovering myself as an independent woman. I think each frog has added to the mix and has taught me something else. And each friend has been supportive and helped me leap over those hurdles.....

As for Mr. Long Distance Lover. Only time can tell where that will go. But right now, we are fulfilling a loneliness that existed in both our hearts. And that is making me happy....

Sorry guys, no sex tonight. The wine and a trashy love novel has made me more serene!!
XOXO