Methods of Dealing With Insecurity and Sarcasm!

Today was actually a great day...for absolutely no reason. Well, okay, that's not true, everytime I would think about my rendezvous, it puts a smile on my face and my pussy has been wet all day. I guess Juicy is a good nickname for me after all.

And what I am finding is Mr. Government is good for my soul and head. I admit it, I am a little maintenance. Not super high maintenance but I do like the little thoughtful things. Some communication that you are thinking about me. Doesn't have to be a full conversation, a little text message, IM or message on my voice mail is perfect. And Mr. G- is good at that. And stupid things like, "how was your day? and he really wants to know what I did and how my day was. " Such a simple thing that I didn't realize was missing from my life until now.

I am a strange mix. I am a strong, confident businesswoman who will stop at nothing to get what I want. I am not vicious but will negotiate with a sweet smile on my face. As some people would say...watch out when I take something on that is important to me. I go full force..."the building shakes when you are in it!"

Yet, when it comes to personal things I can be insecure. I am a thinker and analyzer. My mind starts to think too much and I fill in the blanks causing me to get sarcastic and defensive. Can you believe it..ME SARCASTIC?!? But, I noticed that every guy deals with insecurity and sarcasm differently. So here is my version of how guys (and gals) online deal with:
The Methods of Dealing With Insecurity, Conflict & Sarcasm:

The Retreat Method- --ignore the situation totally and disappear from email and IM for awhile. (aka) the school teachers approach, control freak and cold bastard/bitch approach

The Ignore Method- this is selective hearing. Write back like the other person never said anything---a sure way to make that person feel like they are in the Twilight Zone and cause them to go back and re-read what they sent to you. Spinning of the mind, confusion...

The Attack Method- Add salt to the wound. Magnify the person's insecurities and cause them to feel even worse than they did before. Attempt to make them feel like pond scum and like they need to seek professional help.

Re-Assurance Method-quick acknowledgement and quick re-assurance with a smooth, sweet comment or one to make them laugh. And move on. "Hey sexy, couldn't get away but was thinking about you". or "Relax sex kitten, crazy day but thought about your tongue and its abilities"

The Shrinky Dink Method- Try to psychologically analyze it, drag it out and patronize the person like they are on a shrink's couch. Hmmmm.....

The Baggage Method- use it as an opportunity to drag in all past problems and baggage into it. Pull out all the dirty laundry--even that skanky pair of underwear that's been all the way in the back of the closet!

The Drama Method- Truly magnify the little insecurity as if it is the as important as "whether to pull the plug on a life support machine". Pull in a variety of the other methods above and distort it to the max.

Did I miss any? Let me know! Have a great night and day.