I'm A Survivor

Mentally drained. What a day. Seeing my angel in so much pain was more than I could bear. My phone ringing while they were doing the procedure, oh, my husband saying my son wouldn't let him use his computer...they were fighting. are they for real? I am holding my daughter who has stars in her eyes from pain and they are calling me about this?! I just hung up. I am by far the only adult in that house.



Work calls mounting through the whole procedure (the doctor commenting how I must be an important person. I told him, nothing was more important than my baby). They finished the procedure, I swooped her up and told her how much I loved her. She held on to me for dear life. How horrible for your child to be in pain, wrapped up and her looking at you as they are hurting her. My heart is hurting right now....probably left a scar on me more than her.


Mr. Porsche called me, I called him after the procedure. I didn't want him to know how fucked up I was....Ironically, I did turn to Mr. Electric and he was no where to be found.

And as for Mr. Cable, well, I think we are going to take a little breather. He told me today that his Ex is into a threesome. I can't believe him. That's not what I want and I told him that. My answer to him "well why don't you make it a twosome and enjoy her again". As Mr. Prize said...a little premature...my response....yeah and a little immature too. Plus, here is a guy who literally spent over $20,000 on a SuperBowl party and gambling on the game. And I can't pay my mortgage. It kind of steams me a little bit. He has shares in ski houses, travels all around the country for fun events and he is cheap with me. Its not happening. Mr. Porsche is all over the place too and travels a lot but he's different. It's his lifestyle, he's not flaunting it...plus, he treats me well and with respect. He has a good heart. Mr. Cable, I think is still a college kid that just is lucky enough to have the bucks to blow.

And then there is Mr. Prize who is amazing. He has been my support for so long and he continues to be a great friend. Someone who is always in my corner with good advice. You know, I have had my affairs but what I cherish the most is the friendships.


So, a few of you wrote to me worried about my state of mind. I am okay. You know my theory on life, tomorrow is a brand new start. And I will go to sleep tonight and cry. And let out all my hurt and anxiety. And wake up tomorrow with a new day. Sweet Dreams