Before children, my careers always involved traveling and entertaining. I went to the finest restaurants, clubs, spas etc.etc. With this career, one client is being wined and dined by major companies and I am lucky enough to be able to be shadowed by some of those perks.
Yesterday, a much needed day.....no driving, no running around. We literally had a meeting at one restaurant (4 hours) then went to the Red Door Spa to be pampered and then proceeded to the next hottest new restaurant in the area.
As I laid on the table (you can imagine, it took me forever to relax), I couldn''t clear my mind....but it still felt good. As I laid there it made me realize, my life is truly insane. I am getting underpaid at my present gig but it allows me to be with the kids. The woman I am with is getting paid 3 times as much as I make in a year. But everything has its downfalls. She has no children. well, even with all my crap....that is one part of my life I am so happy that I have. I wouldn't give up my children for anything and at the same time, they are the ones that hold me back from a full blown career. Life is so damn difficult at times.
I did relax, I did get to think, I did feel like everyday should be filled with reflexology, aromatherapy, facials, swedish massages, pressure point treatments. It made me focus better when I felt better. Of course the two killer meals are making me head to the gym in a minute. I feel like you can roll me away today. Yes, today is the start of my big deal diet.
Mr. Porsche is busy this week too. But I miss him terribly. Actually, it was so sweet. he said to me too, I miss you a lot and really want to see you. It feels so good to be missed. before the massage, I now realize that I was sinking into an asexual depression. I was starting to close down again. I hadn't wanted sex or thought about sex in almost two weeks. But yesterday after my massage, I felt amazing. my sexuality woke up again.
We are going to try and sneak some time today. Its not looking good but at least we are going to try....have a great day!!!
t
2 comments:
Hello,
I have been reading your blog for awhile and feel we are living life very much alike.
I do not leave because of my children but last night I beggeg the husband to leave. Of course he wont! Not the first time I have asked him. Anyway I just wanted to let you know you are not alone in this. I hope you get to see your man today, nothing like getting fulfilled to help make your days better!
Hey Butterfly!
They aren't going anywhere. And I would never leave my children either so yes we are in a similiar boat. It's going to take a filing for divorce to get them out...or provoking to get the police to get them out. how sad. so sad. But we have to keep going!! thanks for writing....love hearing from friends!
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