I am back...it only hurts when I sit now. Like a hemmoroid I guess. I was cracking up yesterday...to think I write a blog and give my butthole updates......I mean only in the BlogWorld....lol Such a private thing yet I reported step by step....LMAO

I have to let it go for now and move on. Deal with it again when he contacts me.

I haven't reported the second half of the day with MM because it feels like it didn't happen. How could I have gone from one spot to having a day like we had. Because it was so good, it is now so painful to think about. One, because its not going to ever happen again but also because how could I go on with the day as if nothing happened? how little respect did I have for myself? However, in my defense, I didn't feel pain after and I didnt want us to end like that..in a negative drama moment. I did think about leaving but I composed myself.

So as I said, it was his birthday...no mention of it..but as we lied there he said "why did you have to see me today?"

Innocently I looked at him....Just did! Why? Anything wrong with today? With an innocent girl look. Oh he knew that I knew yet he loved the game.

I bought lunch...and we ate and we talked. It was nice. We spoke about work, about life, friends, how things are bad financially....we joked...he was back to himself.

And then we finished eating our sandwiches and I got up....and took this great brownie cake slice and put a candle in it. He hates this..I knew it..I did it anyway and was giggling..... Make a wish....he quickly blew out the candles....damn your still here....lol And I laughed and said.....oh I can arrange that to be different..no I don't want that..he said. And he kissed me.

And then the fun began......I grabbed the whipped cream and slowly covered the tip of his cock. It was cold, he laughed. I licked up every little bit of it...he loved it. So now, you know me, over the top, whipped creamed his entire cock and balls AND if you remember the sparkles incident (the sparkles from my Victoria Secret underwear were everywhere and he was flipping) WELL....today I brought SPRINKLES.....and I said, you told me no sparkles but you didn't say anything about....SPRINKLES....and I covered his cock with sprinkles....well he was dying...laughing so damn hard...we both were. And then I ate and sucked every inch of his cock...getting each sprinkle....it was hysterical....

After I was done, we kissed and then we had one of our hot sex sessions. His cock knows just how to find my GSpot. And this time, he knows how to make my body sing. And he did. I was cumming like a river....my clit needed that release.

We lied down and held each other. We talked as if nothing had happened earlier. We talked about stupid things and watched the Brady Bunch on the Trivia Pursuit television show. A little time passed and then we found ourselves kissing slowly....two people with emotional voids. Two people who are deprived of that caring and loving touch and affection from another. We made love. Slow, passionate, slow thrusts, slow caresses and that holding onto each other for dear life. Those kisses that have passion, those waves of heaven that flow over you. Missionary position...with him kissing me and me holding him so close that our bodies couldn't get any closer. Holding him and hugging him as if I were never going to make love again in my life. And then we both came. Which usually its when we are more wild...but this time, it was during this session.

So as you can see, it was as if I was with two different people there. I don't think he would have done what he did if he knew it was going to hurt me like that but it was an act of violation. Hopefully now you can see, why I was even more torn by what happened. I mean it wasn't just violent..then it would have been easy. It was every emotion that could possibly exist in life.

It took me days to write this post. I think I needed to details to disappear a little from both parts of the day. IT was a hot and memorable day and also the most horrible experience and my mind had problems computing it. I admit it, I was depressed all week. Really badly depressed. Other crap went down too. It was one of those emotional rollercoasters.