Meet Mr. MBA

Thanks everyone for your comments and support. Actually, you are all right. My reason for divorcing is not to catch him...and I realize it doesn't matter. I guess I was looking for the coward's way out in a way. Or, I know I have a thing with people trying to get over on me....I guess its a control thing. Whatever it is...Anonymous you hit it right on the head..... I am lonely not alone. There is always people around me.....and with a smile, the loneliness is sometimes so deep (but no one knows). Sankukbaby.....you are a soldier?!?! Mmmm.....don't get me going on soldiers...lol

So.....a lot of crap happened in the last few days. I met Mr. MBA. What a disappointment. I mean he was the same man that I spoke to except...he reminded me of a weasel in person. Oh that is mean, but he did. I cannot imagine being in bed with him. When he went to kiss me, I pulled away. Not my type...so upsetting because I mentally enjoy him. But sexually it wasn't there for me. Unfortunately, it was there for him. He has been calling, texting and IMing me like crazy....suffocating actually. Well that's not fair to say because if I liked him I would like the attention. But right now....my state of mind is a little fucked up. Feeling very unappreciated by all men in my life.

So last night, major upheavel in the house, which thankfully passed. Let's just say, I was sitting in my car in the schoolyard because I thought I might lose it at home.

I had a long talk with Mr. Porsche last night. I think I told you about our meeting. He has been so busy, he hasn't been able to see me. I was Miss. Understanding...I sat with him at motor vehicles and we talked. I got to see him for a 1/2 hour. It was fine..I was just glad to see him and he called three times to thank me for being so understanding. I felt good...like I did the right thing by being understanding and not pushing....we're all busy at times.

And then.....there is this Organiser who helps him (spelled wrong on purpose--just in case he ever does a search). Our professional careers do overlap in some ways. I've told you before how I help Mr. Porsche with his business. So I recommended using Craigslist last week to fill a position. I had just done it for three other clients and it was extremely successful. Now....keep in mind, he has no time for me. So when I called him thursday night to say good night...he said he was in a meeting. Ok...what are you doing.....going over some termination stuff. I thought it might be Miss. Organiser but what does she have to do with emloyee terminations?

Okay, I admit it. I am jealous and quite frankly pissed. From a professional standpoint, he has no time to go over stuff we have pending...and I would have done the damn Craigslist for free. But he pays this girl to do it with him? So am I upset that he doesn't value me professionally or am I upset that he spent three hours with her? I've mentioned her before, nonchalantly saying that I thought he was sleeping with her and it was no biggie. He swears he isn't and that he would tell me. He even seemed shocked that I thought he might be sleeping with her. The professional thing--he claims. Doesn't want her to think we are together in anyway. Hmmm..is that because it is purely professional with her or are you doing her and you don't want her to know about me?!?

I know I am acting like a child right now but I am so hurt. I feel so unappreciated and that he values my opinion less. I am not going to do anything else for him workwise, I decided that today. And what an ass I am....I got a 1/2 hour and wait, a slice of pizza. He worked late every night....he could have asked me to meet him at his office. When I mentioned the termination and he told me it was her on Friday night...I got really quiet. I had drank a 1/2 bottle of wine and decided I better not say anything I might regret. Do I really think he is doing her? I am not sure. I don't think so because he was so concerned someone put a camera in his office, that's why we haven't been in there (he was out of town when the security system was set up). So what do you think? Think he is doing her? SURVEY TIME!! Place your vote to the right. Don't be shy. At least let's make this frustration informative, interactive and entertaining......LOL

All right, I am going to sleep. Mad at Mr. Porsche, missing and angry with MM. Funny how flashbacks can be so wonderful and yet so brutal at times. My myspace is filled with music that reminds me of him. Guess it wasn't so smart to listen to a repertoire of songs that we had wild sex to.

One last funny story, the hubby had his headphones on today....singing one of the songs that MM and I have had outrageous sex to. It was driving me crazy....my skin was crawling. PAyback is a bitch was all I could think. He's probably doing it to that song too...lol Oh man....if I didn't know better, I would think he knew and was torturing me with it. But he doesn't, he's not that smart. However, I do think it was a message from up above. Basically saying Get Your shit together Cheri....