King Dong is not my Prince Charming

I realized I didn't post my meeting with Mr. Porsche. Fabulous as always. Physically and Intellectually......what is missing.....the emotional....oh it is there between us and it is strong but its the emotional connection when you are married that makes it tough. And i realized I am guilty of it too. I avoid a man's eyes when we are in missionary.....I keep that emotional guarded, will either make it light with a joke or turn it dirty by whispering little things in his ear. This time, i looked in Mr. Porsche's eyes and the connection can be overwhelming. He kissed with passion......wild how you can feel the electricity. Oh, I came three times. But more importantly for me......he kept cumming......another double cum which shocks him and sends his head into euphoria. It's the oh wow factor....



Sooooo, last night King Dong and I got on line and IM'd back anf forth. He did pull away the night before....funny how you can feel it through IM. He admitted it. My baggage is a lot (note to myself--do not tell other men about my situation with my children at home. Single men can't take it). Ironically, married men find that to be a strength. They are impressed with my strength. Single men, look at it as baggage.



Well I was out last night for a gala event. After the event, I called King Dong to meet. You see, I needed to meet him. This man was dangerous since he was on my mind and making me feel insecure. We met in a parking lot and then we were going to get a Starbucks or go for a drink at the bar across the street.

We never got that far. We sat in his car and talked. Intrigued by me is what he said. He admitted he felt awkward with my daughter's situation....the whole situation. Seeing him in person, his body was hot....HOWEVER, he seemed older than the pix he sent. Which is fine, he still was really good looking. He was sincere, he was caring and due to my daughter's situation (because he does medical mediating) he understood it way too well. He was able to take a deeper look into my life (one I don't let people see). He felt my heartaches, he knows what someone in my situation goes through. However, he also hears the worse.

Anyway, he wasn't comfortable with it. We spoke, there was no sexual contact. He was serious, so damn serious. Quite frankly, a downer. There is a dark side to him...and a really heavy side of him. He hardly smiled, he wasn't a joking around type and our conversation was way too serious. He thinks too much and quite frankly is too serious and deep. We got along, I truly enjoyed him as a person but as a lover---I was happy to say that I didn't want him either.

He was torn with me. He enjoyed me, he thought I was pretty but my situation. I was trying to explain that he had no responsibility to my kids....that I was a self sufficient woman but he thought too much. I am beginning to think that a single guy is not for me...why? they are looking to get married. This is the third guy who I met that was still in search of a wife. I am not looking for that....if they are single at 40, they want to settle down and at this point of my life--I am looking for freedom and no commitments.

We left the meeting that he was going to think about it, that we would still be friends. Cocky on his part, assuming that I wanted him. I actually walked away thinking I really liked him but as a romantic partner, he wasn't for me. Even with his 9+ inches. Fun, excitement, exhilaration is what I want. Someone so serious is what I don't want. I need someone who enjoys life, enjoys laughing, who loves to giggle. He is not that person at all. A little bit of a bummer.

So I left last night and felt great! Why? This guy brought out all my insecurities. He was like a cover of a romance novel, I thought he was my Prince Charming....and when we met, I was glad to see he wasn't. He was like the romance novels, those guys always are internally tormented and the woman sticks by her man to internally save him. Well, King Dong is a really good catch but I don't need such a darkside. I want someone who makes me feel ALIVE!! Baggage is one thing, internal saving is another.

And, I love my baggage. And any man who can't handle it-too bad. There is absolutely no negotiation when it comes to my children. They are what counts......so back to the drawing board. But I feel better. Physically he wanted me....physically my breasts were turning him on beyond belief as they were looking sooo hot last night. but that's okay