Sometimes there are loose ends. Sometimes there are just connections that seem to keep you attached. Sometimes there are flashbacks of hot sex and pull you back in. Whatever it is, something lures you back until the desire totally dies.
Remember the multi-millionaire that I had a quick fling with a few years ago. He has been contacting me three times a week. I realize the sex wasn't great then and honestly, he isn't doing it for me now either. I totally ignored him.
Mr. Security is back in the pix. We are just friends now. He is going through some tough crap and he needs a friend. I do like him but you are not going to believe it. And I am not saying this because of all the controversy it caused in my blog. But we were talking and the reason he kept his distance--the cuddle. I was dying. So I stand corrected. some people really can't stand the cuddle. Anyway, we have been texting every day. His wife wiped out the bank accounts. They are fighting over the kids..its a disaster. I really feel bad for him. And right now, we are going to be just friends. Too much drama in both our lives.
Mr. Astronaut and I had phone sex yesterday. Something about him (bad of course) lures me back in. Actually he was there for me during a crazy day and he gave me direction on what to do. I had a major emergency (a tree crashed through my shed and ripped off part of my deck) and he basically talked me through it. I was so glad that he was there to direct me on what to do. HOWEVER, we are going no where. He has this DREAM of a threesome and he is obsessed with it. He can see having an affair with me but wants this threesome to happen. I told him tonight we werent a match. I may be into a threesome (and I have been thinking about it) but I am not going to make a promise like that. So, I stopped BBMing him today.
And my mindset. Part of me wants nobody for the first time in a really long time. Oh I have been cruising Ashley MAdison and even helped a male friend set up his profile this weekend. But I am not contacting, not returning the messages--I kind of feel that right now is not a good time to bring in a new frog. I have major decisions to make....legal separation or divorce. This has been keeping me up at night. Divorce seems final and I can go on with my life. Legal separation, i get to keep his health insurance but I think its going to keep me up at nights since it isn't finished. Yesterday I was leaning towards legal separation, today I want a divorce. Any one out there have some opinions on this?
And this is the first time in my life that something hysterical happened but I can't blog it. But one day, I will go back and read this and the memory will hopefully come flooding back to me and I will crack up. so this is a placemark for my I Love Lucy Life. Sometimes it feels good to act 15 again and laugh so hard that you almost pee in your pants! All I can say, nothing in the world is like old friends!
6 comments:
OK, so being self employed, I know how expensive health insurance can be. So yes, buying your own would be a drag.
But if he is still going to cover the kids regardless, and you can possibly afford to buy insurance for yourself, then get the divorce. You will sleep better.
Get a divorce and get your self respect back! You aren't helping your marriage by sleeping around (you have already checked out)and you aren't helping other marriages by having sex with married men. You aren't going to meet a married prince charming because there is nothing charming about a guy stepping out on his family.
I guess it's only Princess Charmings who step out on their families that's OK, eh?
I agree
its one thing to have an affair (things happen) but its another thing all together to go out looking for one. And with other married people no less!!
Come on now. Maybe you need to look at the real reason you are avoding a full time, proper relationship.
You deserve better, not someone's crumbs.
Peace out.
Am so glad not me with those comments. I have been reading Cheri's blog for a long time now and while she has gone through more chit then almost anyone, I agree.
Like I have told her before, she needs to check herself first and find a good man that will treat her right (she deserves that). But agree, its not on AM that is for sure.
Cheri you deserve more than this! The other previous posters are right.
Don't think we are attacking you or trying to tell you how to live but as your loyal blog followers, I think we can sense that you are a good person and someone with substance.
I'm all for having flings or whatever you need to get by in life. But not with other married men... have them with someone who can give you 100%.
Don't go searching for these types of relationships. They are frowned upon in society for a reason- not just moral reason- no-one benefits from them at all. they are doomed from the start.
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