Releasing The Fantasy!

It is a fantasy yet it was not far from what reality could have been if we were together. This fantasy been trapped inside of my head and I've been pushing it back down now for quite sometime. Every once in awhile a segment will pop into my brain. And it usually is triggered by something stupid (a song, a hobby we both like). But I think if I allow it to go onto paper (or blog) , I will be able to let it go for good. I always told my kids "if you tell someone a bad dream, it never comes back". It does work. While this is not a bad dream at all, it is just a fantasy that needs to fade since even if we continue our friendship, this part is gone. So as I type this to you, it's as if I am ripping it out of my notebook of life and throwing it into the garbage.

The fantasy is over one day but it is 3 lovemaking sessions. (Hey he said he could handle keeping it hard for a long time and getting it up a few times so I was certainly going to put him to the test.)

Episode 1: We meet in the parking lot of the motel. Our eyes lock in and all the hurt and anger disappears. I slip so comfortably into his arms. The feeling of peace and balance that I feel in his arms totally blankets me. It's like a re-fueling of my soul. We pull apart and our lips meet. An intense kiss with our tongues wildly going down eachothers throats. WE can barely make it to the room. The intensity is growing and I know that I have to have him in me or I will explode.

We get inside the room and we don't even notice what is around us. The desire is too great and our bodies are craving each other. Animalistically we just rip each others clothes off, savagely exploring each others bodies...this is what we both wanted for so long. Our tongues just explore and my hands are drawn to his cock. I've seen it before and I know that it's size and thickness is something he can certainly be proud of. This cock appears in my dreams, I have to have it now. It is mine to do as I please with. I lower my mouth and attempt to engulf his entire cock in my mouth. My lips just cannot get enough of him. My hands start to join in to make sure that his entire penis is being satisfied. My fingers slowly begin to circle the outside of his anus.

I imagine his mouth on my breasts. I imagine him taking his tongue and circling my nipples and then sucking them hard. I imagine his hand spreading my lips and him rubbing my clit in a circular motion with his fingers now entering me wildly. I am totally soaked, I want him more than I have ever wanted anyone in my life. We are savagely attacking each other as if we've been sex depraved for years and this is our last time we will ever have sex. He's on top and he enters me with his hard cock while his mouth continues to ravage my nipples. However, I want to feel him totally inside of me, I want to enjoy each and every thrust as deep as he possibly can get. So I turn over and he enters me from behind. Thrusting and driving me hard until we both reach our climax. The rhythmatic movement that causes me to scream with joy with every penetration. The Ultimate in Sex! The Ultimate First Connection! I lie down next to him with my hair totally wild from the sex. Both of us breathing heavy, both of us feeling content and both of us wanting even more.

So that's how I pictured our first part of our rendezvous. All right, I have to go up to bed now that I have managed to get myself all horny and worked up. Chris has not stopped by my blog in two weeks because he said "I'm sure your having a great time trashing me". Well I truly hope he doesn't see this one but getting it out of my head and sharing it with you has certainly helped. Looks like Mr. GoodnPlenty will be joining me for a little play tonight! (Sigh) Tomorrow night, I'll tell you the second part of my fantasy.

The Sex Sucked!

As you all know, the hubby was cut off for a long time. Last night, I don't know why, I gave in. Of course I know why....I have been dreaming about sex and an affair for so long, I walk around wet most of the time. So of course, I knew the day would come when I would give in. I also think that Mr. Government and I are getting closer and well, I wanted to see if I should forget the affair and accept just doing it with my hubby.

Well, the sex was so bad. It was so unfulfilling...it was as if it was our first time as if the parts just weren't fitting together. Yes, I did have an orgasm but that was because of the foreplay and my own fantasies in my head. Even though we have a lot of issues, the sex was always good. Last night, was pathetic. I had never felt so distant and mechanical. Of course, he's smiling this morning. He did say it was a little off last night...but he still enjoyed it (now that shows you how bad it actually was).

Mr. Government and I are planning to meet this week in a motel. That shy boy has turned around and is not so shy anymore. Still, there is something that I am not sure. Is it Chris? I don't think so.

Chris sent me a long email and well it made sense what he said. Bottomline: Our connection is too deep. Our affair would be too emotional. But he's even pushing our friendship away for a little while. But I have accepted that Chris and I will not be hooking up. Very sad because that would have been the ultimate in a sexual rendezvous. Look, do you blame me, I finally found someone who is into the same offbeat hobbies as me, as the same warped mind and sense of humor, sexually has similar fantasies and we were both willing to try anything for each other. Hmm. Think that would have been hot? It would have been wild.
Truthfully, I would love to just fuck him and maybe it wouldn't be so good. And that would be great. Because that fantasy of the two of us is kind of overshadowing my mind and these other guys have a lot to live up to. Maybe if I put the fantasy down here in my blog....it can creep out of my head. Okay, next blog post will be my Chris Fantasy......I can't get wet now, I have to go to my kids schools and be the good mommy and go trick a treating and pumpkin picking!!! I'm dressed like an angel today.....think I better bend that halo just a little bit though!
Happy Halloween!!

My Friend's Husband Hit On Me!

I went to a bar this weekend with some couples. Sounds innocent right? Well I wonder if your body sends off signals or if there is a neon sign on my forehead saying "Looking To Cheat". One of my friend's husbands is very hot. We've been friends for years. Last night, he made a move on me. We were all drinking, having a great time and I went to get the next pitcher of beer. He volunteered to help me get the beer (nothing unusual--we've been doing this for years). We know the owners at the bar so we went into the backroom to get some munchees (Still not out of the ordinary) "You look really hot tonight Cheri". "Thanks Mr. Barfriend" (boring nickname for lover but this is the only post he''ll ever be in). As I reached down for the bag of pretzels, I felt his body up against mine from behind. I turned around quickly and he trapped me against the counter and he kissed me. His body was leaning up against me and I could feel he was hard as a rock. His tongue was deep inside my mouth and while I was tempted (being drunk and all)--he's my friends husband. He touched my tit and that was the end. I had to push him away. I said- "What the fuck was that?!? " He said-"Come on Cheri, you know I've wanted to screw you for a long time"
I said- "I don't cheat and I certainly wouldn't with my friends husband". He said-"that's too bad, it would be hot". I said 'don't ever fucking do that again". He said-"You'll change your mind when you think about it" I said -"I'll change my mind when hell freezes over" He said- "Well it's going to be a cold winter". And he walked out. Now that is balls. My friend's husband---stupid ass! Doesn't he know the rules of cheating--never do someone very close to home, especially a friend's husband. I am not going to be next month's local gossip. But between you and I, he knows how to kiss, I liked his body up against mine and the brief moment he was grabbing my tit my nipple immediately responded to his touch. But, it will never happen again....what's the saying "you don't shit where you eat!" I think the earth's orbit is off or something.....or since we all turned 40 something, we are all hornier and getting restless!

Crushed Heart!

A sick comic but this is a definite sick situation. I know I said it would be a quiet weekend for me but my heart was just run over like that poor dogs face. I sent Chris a note, to try and straighten things out. Well, anger is an understatement. Basically, this is somehow all my fault, I threw him into Soccer Moms arms and he put his profile back on line. He has two dates in the next two weeks. So, what happened to the guy who didn't want to have an affair? What happened to the guy who cared about me? What happened to my soulmate? He's not doing the podcast either now. I can honestly say I have never been the recipient of so much anger and hatred of a note. He was downright cruel. So, I am more shocked and stunned more than anything else. I was waiting for him in my heart. I wanted him to be the first--but I was so stupid. Somehow in his head...I kicked him to the curb. When the hell did I do that?
Mr. Government has been so patient with me and so nice. I just wasn't sure if I wanted to make that move---but hey what am I waiting for? Obviously, Chris isn't in the cards. So I guess its goodby...my heart is broken into a million pieces right now. I will start re-building tomorrow. I took him off my IM (I can't see when he's online) and now its time to officially seal closed that door.
And a quick update....my husband did remember our anniversary. He let me sleep late, got the kids off to school and woke me with fresh flowers and said Happy Anniversary as soon as I opened my eyes. That really was a sweet gesture. Unfortunately, there is so much anger, it's hard for me to let go of it. But I am going to try.
So, I guess next week is Mr. Government's lucky week. I am so tired of waiting for something that is never coming, I am going to screw his brains out like he has never known. I will make sure that it is so intense for both of us, no inhibitions, no delaying just amazing sex. Wish me luck! Can you believe Chris? I am still stunned.

Booty Caller Was All Talk

I give up! I really do. Today the most unexpected thing happened. Booty Caller found that he not only has a conscious BUT he was afraid that he was going to get emotionally attached to me....I was in his mind and his head all the time. Okay, this time I found someone that I knew I wasn't going to get emotionally attached to because he just wasn't my type (he was a selfish icicle--hot looking, funny but very self asbsorbed). I swear, we were going to lunch today---public place, not a motel. So I was shocked to get this email. I did call him after and we spoke for awhile. There's a caring guy under that icicle. So let's see, another one gone because they were starting to care about me. Okay, I should turn into a bitch...as long as I am nice, I am going to be the Virgin Cheater. I just keep scaring them away. Isn't life hysterical!

Booty Caller sent:
"I ran into a wall. I tossed and turned all night about our meeting today. I didn"t expect that my insides would end up in a knot. This was supposed to add some fun onto my life not cause me to loose sleep. So my dear I have to pull out of this whole situation. I don't want to be the guy who sneaks around sleazy motels just to get a little.

Good Luck and be smart. You are an amazing woman. You are hot, sweet and extremely desirable. I know...totally my loss"

Celebrate our Anniversary?!?!

Crazy weekend so my posts will be very few. First, I am having lunch today with Booty Caller. Didn't have to make the decision (whew!) because Mr. Government had some government thing that he had to do and he won't be available till after 4PM (too late for me). So that actually works out. He wanted to get together tomorrow but, well, I may be a cheater but my Anniversary is coming up and well, that just doesn't sit well with me. Jokingly, Booty Caller said he is taking me out today for an Anniversary Lunch (warped but it was funny).
So the Anniversary! I can honestly say that this one is the first time that I am totally not looking forward to it. How do you celebrate a joining of love that is really not a joining anymore. I do care about him (although we are in a real bad funk right now) but to celebrate our marriage is just well a farce right now. And, well I am kind of setting him up. I'm not going to mention it. Not a word and I bet that he forgets. Unforunately, I know my parents, friends and family--they will come to his rescue and remind him because they want me to be happy. Guaranteed his sister calls today to remind him (hey--she's not stupid--we get separated and where do you think his first stop would be--her guest bedroom). My parents who know something is up with me. Not this cheating of course but my dad had said that he can feel my distance. He's worried about me. (I admit it I'm daddy's little girl. I love my dad so much, he would do anything in the world for me). and my friends--well, they are great friends and they would do it just to make sure he gets his ass to the jewelry store and picks me up a nice piece of jewelry and flowers. Flowers are my weakness!(I love jewelry too) but for me flowers show a caring. I love exotic flowers, simple flowers, huge flowers, little flowers. I love flowers! At least once a month, I fill the vases in my house with fresh flowers (the smell is almost intoxicating but they just make me smile and feel alive). So back to the Anniversary....he's going to forget, I'm not going to mention it but I do hope in a bizarre way that someone does remind him without me knowing. At least then, it won't be another nail in our marriage coffin! Then of course, there is the Anniversary Sex. It's been pretty quiet in our bedroom because I can't do a man that I'm angr with. But if he remembers, there will be sex. Funny, no matter how many problems we may have, he still walks around with a hard on for me. If I just smile at him, the man gets hard. When things were good with us, we could screw twice a day. Always in different rooms of the house in different positions. While the positions are still there, Hey variety is the spice of life, the frequency has drastically declined (my choice).
Okay, time to get ready for work and do the mommy thing now. But honestly, do I sound like I am being a total bitch? You can tell me....is it horrible not to remind him?

Double Booked!

Okay, I am obviously not very good at this cheating thing. People like SPG Diaries somehow manages to juggle three or four women at a time. I have been really busy with this charity event and I didn't realize that I said yes for lunch tomorrow to both Booty Caller and Mr. Government. Booty Caller has the location, time and emailed to ask me if I was going to wear underwear. He's a hoot. Actually, tonight I am not excited about either one. I'm not sure why (okay that's BS--I know why, I was clearing out my voice mail and heard Soulmate's voice---I really miss our friendship a lot but it looks like he is really gone).

Had coffee today with my Book Reviewer Mandy. Mandy's got her own thing going on. We are in similiar boats except she is doing a guy right in our neighborhood (major no no of smart cheating). It's great to sit down with a friend sometimes, especially one that is as warped as me. Here we are sitting and discussing her book review "Blow Him Away" and she is telling me the details of how to improve on Blow Jobs and how her husband really had felt the difference when using the book techniques. I was dying. Two tables away is two friends that we know through the community. They were discussing....the latest shoe styles at our local shoe store. Funny how two conversations could be just so opposite. Of course, we joined together and heard about the latest gossip and who was getting divorced and who got caught last week having an affair (wonder if I will ever be the conversation of the cheating spouse at the local Starbucks)! However, if I am ever the topic of gossip, I want to make sure that it is really good and juicy! Oh! Check out Mandy's review in a few days (she wants to practice a few techniques on her lover before submitting her review). Talk about dedication (she's nuts and I love her) www.rendezvousradio.com

My Good & Plenty--Most Reliable!

Meet my best friend--Mr. Good & Plenty! No don't be fooled by his size..he's got some little buzzin going on that can really get you going. And, he is always available to me, doesn't talk back and manages to always get the right spots. If I'm really feeling a little naughty, he's great for a little anal action. Versatility and compact! Yes, out of all my toys, this one probably gets the most action because it is so compact. Now it's not like my super duper intense sessions but it certainly relieves my sexual tensions.
Well, I haven't had much time for thinking because I have a million things going on this week. However, I came to the conclusion that Mr. Government, something is just not right there. I don't know. I am not myself with him and I can't place where he is at. In some ways he reminds me of shrinky dink (that is not good) so caught up in public display of affection, looking around, he makes me paranoid. His kiss was pretty good, he pressed his body against mine and I could feel that he was into me. But, there's just something. Last night he emailed me and wanted to know my fantasies but I am afraid my honest, blunt way will scare him to death yet he asks for it. He's a hard one to read. Funny, I'm tired of reading guys. I am honest and I will tell you what is on my mind. And I think most guys can't handle that. Do you want me to lie? Do you want me to play the game? I can be anything you want me to be. I can be sweet, I can be naughty, I can be bitchy, I can be super horny, I can act like an angel, I can be a devil. I'll be whatever you want me to be?!? Sorry......I'm Cheri. And, I am not into that game anymore. So Mr. Government is going to have to work now for my affection. He wants to meet me on Thursday.....not this week. I actually made plans today with Booty Caller for Thursday. I know, I know. But his approach is rather refreshing these days. I don't have to worry, I would never want to be his friend.His thoughts on life are the total opposite of mine. The world revolves around him and right now, I am a part of that world. And, he knows exactly what to say to make that world a sweet, sweet place to be. "Baby, where ever you want me to take you for lunch." An email "thinking about that smile". Is he full of shit? Absolutely! Oh I think he is thinking of me and I think that right now I am turning him on but I know his type too well. Cold as Ice and calculating. So, I am not rushing in any direction right now. Although, with booty caller, there is no thinking. I saw whatever is on my mind, even if it sarcastic and he just feeds it back to me with sugar and spice and everything nice! (like another friend that I once had).
Okay, early night for me. I need my beauty sleep. Finished some of my ME treatment today. I had a pedicure that was to die for. This woman massages your feet, does some reflexology....I am not a fond foot lover but I could see how someone could be into a foot fetish. Maybe I should look for a married reflexologist in search of cheating..now he could massage my feet and toes all day....nothing like really narrowing my search!

5 Year Plan- (3 Years + Left)

Maybe it's just me but the thought of being in this marriage for eternity is just too overwhelming sometimes. I decided two years ago that I was going to go on a five year plan. Since our life was so entwined, there was no way I could get a divorce now. So I would work towards it. Slowly unraveling the complications so by the time 5 years came around--it was either divorce or if I wanted to stay married, I would treat myself to some plastic surgery and a trip! Either way, it was a win, win situation. Unfortunately, tonight my three year plan was just pushed back at least one year. We were re-financing and my credit is much better than his. So for the rate purposes, the note went into my name. So now I owe the money and the bastard still owns 1/2 the house. I was sitting there trying to get the title now all in my name...everyone at the table knew what I was doing...they all saw where it was going (except for the hubby) so I had to back down before he caught on. He knew I was pissed because of something else that was included in the deal and he knew about it-----"he didn't lie, he just conveniently forgot to tell me".
So as I was driving home, cursing at him and telling him this was the last straw (about the thing he forgot to tell me--I dropped the note thing because he might catch on) it hit me------all my life the biggest disappointments that I've had have been because men have conveniently forgot to tell me things. The child molester was known for that,my husband and now Chris. So, when Chris told me something that shouldn't have been a friendship breaker....it was the fact that he had fallen into that category...."a conveniently forgot to tell". Something I never expected from him.
Anyway, so now my 5 year plan has gotten more complicated instead of easier. But I have decided that I am taking full control over everything now so that will be a minor setback only. Ironically, if I decided to get divorced, I don't think I would remarry. I think I would want to be single, do whatever I wanted when I wanted. But only time will tell.
I met Mr. Government today for coffee. He insisted that he really wanted to see me. So we met again for coffee and just hung out and talked. It was very nice. He's a real sweet guy. I do want to clarify something here....I have a counter on my blog and it shows me the different states people come from...and countries! I am amazed how many of you are from just across the country and even in other countries. (Don't worry it doesn't give me your emails or any personal information). But if you show up from a huge company, it will show the name of the server..(has only happened twice so far). My point, someone from the US Government checked out my site today. Now, I just want to promise that Mr. Government is not a threat to our national security and even if we consummate our relationship, no national secrets will be compromised....and it is not Bill Clinton. (Whew! I got a little nervous when I saw the US Government).

Yummy! A Peppermint Bath

I am quite calm tonight. I just came out of the tub. I know I have written about my tub but it is truly my escape. There is nothing like closing the lights, lighting the candles, burning the lavendar oil, a romance novel, Kyle Minogue music and peppermint oils in the jacuzzi. My tub has lights in it, chromotherapy they call it. It is amazing. It is sensual. The peppermint oil gives you a sensation of tingling all over your body. When I get out of the tub, my entire body smells like a peppermint stick..Totally Yummy! Some nights the moon shines through the skylight. It's so romantic and just so inviting. Kyle Minogue has this greatest hits album that the second CD is just about spark, desire, connection. I sit in my tub and I just think and relax. I try to put everything into perspective. I try to figure out how I am going to find this peace that I am looking for. By the time I get out, I am calm, this peppermint stick is feeling great. The stress has left this body. So, I will go upstairs now and dream. Think about the week ahead and hopefully just fall into a deep, deep sleep.
Mr. Government is back. He really is a caring and nice guy. Just dropped me a TM to say he just landed and he was thinking about me. That he missed me and that he would call first thing in the morning. That he would clear two hours for lunch, just say the day.
Booty Caller and I just took our connection to a new level. I don't know when it happened but he has that way with words. He is very sexual and a challenge...you know me, up for the challenge and the conquer. I had a rough night with the kids so I grabbed a nap today and I came back to the computer with an email....did you dream of me inside of you, my luscious peach? You've given me this hard on that just won't go away...anytime this week, I am yours.
So who knows. This Virgin Cheater is getting closer. I just can't decide which path to take. They both offer me two different fulfillments. They both bring a smile to my face and a tingle all over my body. And funny, I read the Venting Housewife's blog. Her husband sent her this amazing email that I wish I felt such a connection with my husband. But that is so far gone. So, I am just going to wait...wait to see which road feels right.
Sweet Dreams!
P.S. I didn't mention Chris because, well we had another hostile email exchange at 3AM. Too crazy to get into and I swear I feel like I must miss a few emails. In conclusion, I have to let my thoughts of us being able to be more than friends die. (which I think is what he wants as well--although I can't figure it out). He is an amazing person and I love having him in my life. So maybe just a friendship with no sex will work. I asked him to come out and see me so we can talk. A face to face is so needed.
I know what you are thinking, I have my own things going on and I am being a spoiled brat. A hippocrate. But I think it comes down to the fact that he chose her over me and I didn't see it coming. He told me she was gone when #1 was gone. And deception is a real sore spot with me due to past experiences, so I lost it. Hopefully we can salvage a sexless friendship. He's not into me like that anymore, it's fine. Well at least I will taste like peppermint when I lick those wounds tonight! And I thought having an affair would be easy!

Are Married Men More Hornier Sat. Nights?

If you noticed from my post last Saturday night, as I was working on my blog and website, my emails were going wild. Those married personal sites pick up at about 11:00. And, like clock work...additional emails came in from Booty Caller (yummy, yummy), Boy Toy, Tantric Lover and the stalker I thought I got away from the stalker but once again I sent a polite note that I wasn't interested (take note--Soulmate was not on that list). So, my poor website and podcast suffered tonight. I didn't get done half of what I had hoped to do since I was emailing back and forth with Booty Caller till now.
The good news is that I almost fine tuned my podcast promo. I am so psyched about that. I think you all will love it. It's a lot more research than I had thought but it is well worth it and I am having so much fun doing it. As you can imagine, I have to work weird hours on it since the hubby can't see it. So tonight, was a relief that he wasn't home and I didn't have to worry about anyone coming in.
So what it the deal with Saturday nights...I am curious. Come on guys, send me a comment here. Are you men more horny on Saturday nights, did you expect to get it and you were turned away, did you get it and it wasn't enough OR do you have extra energy because you didn't work today? 'Fess up...."Inspiring Horny Minds Want To Know"

Text Message a Vibrator? The Ultimate Sex Toy

Good News! I spoke with the company and if you have a phone that was listed on their list, it will work within the U.S.
Now we are talking a sex toy here!!

Researching for my website tonight, I came across this posting (via the Wire). It is a vibrator that your lover can control with a text message to your phone. I am in the process of posting the info on my site (yes, I want you to go visit my site and I am too lazy to write the info twice)! You lucky people from the UK. I think it is only available there (I emailed the company to check). www.rendezvousradio.com
Sweet dreams! Would you buy it? I can see how this could be a lot of fun!

Hubby's Away, Should I Play?!?

The hubby's away but I am trying to be a good girl today! Focusing on my website and the podcast. I never realized how much work is involved in doing the two of them. I really enjoy it but time flies when I am researching. You would be amazed on how much information you can find on these unique fetishes. I broke down yesterday (confession they say is good for the soul--so I am confessing to you!) I text messaged Soulmate in hopes of clearing the air before the weekend. I like when things are settled. I don't like leaving things unfinished. Well, no response. So my conclusion, is that the no response was the response! If it's too much work to text message, its way too much work to save. Ce La Vie

Of course a day wouldn't be complete without a little email exchange with one of my gentleman friend. Booty Caller is so damn controlling and I think I like that fact that I don't really like the person he is. I have no doubt that I could never, ever have a soul connection with him--and well, I think that is what is turning me on about him. Pure sex! No emotional attachment. Two bodies just going at it. Selfish and physical! Just please me and that's all that matters. Yup! That's what I like about it. An afternoon of delight with him would be physically fulfilling.
And Mr. Government returns tonight from his business trip. Talk about two opposites. He's a really sweet, gentle caring person that wants to fill his emotional and physical void. Talk about two ends of the spectrum! Light Bondage, animalistic sex and dirty talk (Booty Caller) to caring, loving and sweet words of desire! (Mr, Government). My spirits are rising already! Monday should be an interesting day. Both want to take me out to lunch next week. Busy, busy lunch week!

Booty Caller & "He Returned my Pussy...CAT"

Except from Booty Caller: "You are a strong confident women who is seriously contemplating extra marital stuff with another married person. Its not about easy, or lack of respect it is about letting loose and not giving it a thought. If you think that I think you are loose or easy.....wrong. Now cut it out and lets get together for lunch next week so we can flirt and touch some more. Just say the word. "

Okay, I am a flirt and he is hot and just soooo tempting. He's a total control freak (as I am) and I love that he takes control. "Let go Cheri! Let me lead the dance." I can't help but wonder what he is like in bed. He reminds me of this guy from college who I give the award of "Best Oral Sex Performer." (Wow! A lot of flashbacks this week). Beautiful Bod was part of his nickname on campus. I saw him the first day of back to school Sophmore year. He was outside a bar and he took his shirt off. I have never seen a body like that. He was 6'3" and every muscle was defined. A six pack was more like a 12 pack. His arms were huge and cut. I looked at my friends and said "Who is that"? They responded..."Cheri NO!" And that was my goal for Sophmore year...the beautiful bod. IT took me two weeks until he was in my bed. The relationship lasted 6 months but the Booty Calls lasted all the way through college and after college. His body was a body to worship but he was lacking upstairs so I liked the booty calls. Anyway, I had a pussy cat in college that hung out at the bars on our block. Smart cat, she found him at a bar one night and rubbed up against his leg. Of course, he had to return her to me at 2AM. His line "Cheri, I didn't want your pussy to be lonely all night so I brought her home." Well, bless that pussycat! He forcefully threw me up against the wall and his tongue was so far down my throat as my roommates just stood and watched us. We could barely make it up the steps. The house rocked that night. He was unbelievable....he ate me out like nothing I had ever experienced in my life. It was this circle motion around my clit with his tongue, then some sucking and then he'd lick the outside of my hole. There was a rhythm to it that was intoxicating...and then he would stop the rhythm...and I was dying for more. I was totally under his control that night and he knew it. He was torturing me and he wanted me to beg. And I begged! I have never felt such satisfaction and orgasms in my life. My roommates still mention that night till this day when we get together and drink. Last thing we heard, Beautiful Bod was divorced, maybe its time to look those lips and tongue up!! Damn, I have been dying for some oral sex lately. I actually have a racing stripe right now. I was bored yesterday during my ME day so I trimmed and shaved and did a conditioner treatment. Well, I have to get back to my website. Tonight I think it's a good night to research oral sex. What a service I provide for my Rendezvous Radio Community (www.rendezvousradio.com)

"The Meeting OF Two Warped Minds"

Isn't funny how two people who supposedly are wired the same can see the same situation so damn different! It's truly amazing. People can read the same book and they totally interpret it differently--yet the words are the same. I guess it is your own personally life experiences that make the words dance!

Well Soulmate did IM me last night. Both of us too tired to fight. He swears that I am totally wrong and only see it through my eyes. He swears that the webcam night was not the same night. And yet, I swear that I had to read it somewhere. He is as hard headed and adamant as I am and he will not admit that he lied or did anything wrong. In fact, he claims that I ruined us (?!?). He doesn't understand that I am not looking at the kiss with Soccer Mom. I'm upset because of the deceit. Like I said, you see things through your life experiences.

Before my husband, I lived with a guy who was a compulsive, deceitful liar. Hot, huge dick, amazing in bed and the electricity flowed between us. But he was an excellent liar. The truth, I don't think he knew the difference between truth and lies. He was definitely smooth. The finale for us was that he cheated so I moved out. He never admitted it, he will go to his grave denying it but I knew in my heart. Thankfully, I went with my inner gut. He turned out to be a child molester, the lowest form of life in my book. He supposedly molested his own daughter. You would never have known....everyone was shocked. He was the guy that everyone wanted in College and thankfully I escaped.
Now I am not comparing what happened with Soulmate to this at all (I just got side tracked) but trust, due to my life experiences, is so important. Even if you lie, fess up. I just have a problem with people who just keep playing out their lies.
So, I'm at a crossroad right now. Soulmate's story still doesn't add up to me. Nor did he apologize (he does not feel that not telling is lying). Maybe if we were face to face, then it would be different. He did send me this song, In Your Eyes by Jeffrey Gaines and it is extremely touching and pulled at my heart tremendously. Definitely check out the words.
http://www.anysonglyrics.com/lyrics/j/jeffreygaines/inyour.htm

I think what it comes down to is our definition of what we want our relationship to be. I don't know if he knows what he wants. If you claim you don't have time for one affair, how are you going to find time for so many? (I'm not even bringing disease into this). What it seems like is that he wants the close friendship and he wants to just be a booty call at the same time . While he is booty calling Soccer Mom too. And who else knows who else. And I don't think of him as just a booty call. The sex would be hot BECAUSE of the emotional connection we have, so we are fucked basically.

In conclusion, nothing really changed except the anger has subsided a little. I know I'm a bitch when it comes to lying and I can be real stubborn. But I need trust...take it or leave it. And well, it looks like he may want to leave it. Maybe he should look at things from my eyes for a minute! Am I worth some work? Am I worth an apology? Am I worth being honest to? Am I worth more than a booty call? I know I am....does he?

Me Day! Massage, Vibrator & Booty Caller

A Total Me Day! Well 1/2 a day about me. About rebelling against what I have to and should do and go for what I want to do and shouldn't morally do--but what the fuck! The night was hell as I thought about the webcam incident and cried. Woke up angry, puffy eyed and late to get the kids off. I actually sent my daughter to school today with two different sneakers on (they look similiar) and the school asked if I was okay (not something expected from me). Forgot my son's lunch and I'm re-doing the bathroom--found out the hardway the mud floor was still wet. By noon, I had had enough. It was time for me! Got my nails done and a massage (made sure it was Kevin--he massages your breasts too)! Made an appointment for a pedicure and hair tomorrow. Came home and worked a little on the site (which makes me very horny--all this sex research and I'm not getting it) decided I deserved a toy break. No one was home and I found Cleopatra--my real buddy. She was one of the presents from my Toy Sex Party (that story is on my site www.rendezvousradio.com under Spice It Up our life if you are interested). Well, with a vengance, I was determined to cum, not once but I was going to enjoy myself and I did. The sexual tension was released from my body. It felt amazing. I couldn't believe how wet the vibrator was...hope you can't get a shock or something! Stage 1 was beauty Stage 2 was sexual relief Stage 3 Ego Lifter. Who could I turn to---Mr. Band Man--emailed once and well I wasn't in the mood for a tantric lesson...Boy Toy, a quickie but not doing it for me, Mr. Government is out of town so......Booty Caller.

Yes, I can always rely on Booty Caller for that dose of reality and that domineering, cocky hot words. I didn't get into what happened but he knew I got hurt emotionally. His answer was--close your mind and let's just fuck and have fun. Explore eachother bodies and take eachother to the point of no return. Man, he is so smooth. He knows exactly what I need to hear. "Cheri, let me take control. Let me take you away for a few hours...you deserve it. No repsonsibility, no decisions to make....I will lead the way...you just show up, I will take you out to lunch, pamper you and make you feel amazing." Okay, so what am I doing here? Is he smooth or what? We settled on lunch in a week because I know today would have been stupid. He left it ---"you are such a hot, confident woman and I want you. I want those lips, they are succulent--anyday you want or need me, you call, I am yours". Let's give the guy an A+ for lifting my ego. Is he real? He's a booty call but that's what I need so I will go on that lunch! So Mr. Government is returning tomorrow and he treats me like a lady so I'm going to keep them both! Together, they are perfection!

The Ultimate Sex Betrayal on A Webcam!

RETRACTION! His date was not Friday Night . I feel much better about that because that really made me lose faith in him as a human being. However, the trust issues and he blames me for ruining our friendship.

So if you read my post regarding soulmate and my webcam rendezvous, you would have known that I was so into our webcam moments. If I couldn't touch him, well at least I could get him off. So let's see, after my last post, I went back to look at some of our old IMs. Probably to torture myself, I went back to the Webcam IM we recently had. Then it hit me. That was last Friday, the night he had his date. So he sucked face with Soccer Mom and came home and webcammed with me. So the ultimate betrayal, there was probably a 30/70 shot that I was on his mind while he was jerking off (if that much). I think I'm being generous here for my own ego. I literally threw up last night thinking about what a fool I have been. More that I really cared about him. More that I really trusted him. The sexual thing is not a big deal....it's the loss of trust and friendship that is truly killing me right now. My head is spinning today.

But I am a survivor. Always have been and always will be. It will take me a couple of hours today, but I will find the energy to pull myself together. A little reflection, a little inner soul searching and the re-building of that fucking brick wall. This time, NO ONE gets in so easily. High security tactics are needed. I am in search of an affair. No more soulmates, no more sharing my inner thoughts and desires. Pure, intense sex! Keep it on the level. Be friends but no more best friends. Keep that wall up high enough to fulfill that emotional void without someone moving into that area. Hmmm...maybe today is a good day to call Booty Caller. Hubby is out of town, returning tonight and gone again for the weekend. A Booty Call is what I might need to put me back in the right frame of mind. Even if its just some sucking face and some oral sex with a hot man....I think it's time to get back into the ME mode again. My ego needs some stroking and well so could other areas of me. Hey! He claims to love satisfying a woman, so, I think I might make plans for Saturday for him to put his oral expertise to the test. Okay, time to make those beauty appointments for my head....a manicure, pedicure and a clean waxing for the ultimate in enjoyment!

My Soul Mate Is Gone

Well tonight is really a sad night for me. I lost my soulmate. No I didn't lose him at a crowded restaurant, I lost him emotionally. Things have been rough for us due to distance but we still had this amazing connection. So many of the same interests, he gave me strength. For awhile, he's been tellling me he didn't want to have an affair with anyone. But we kind of knew that when we would see eachother, the chemistry would probably take over. As I told you, it would have been the best sex I've ever had. Because of the combination of our fantasies, desires and this connection...the thought of it could make me get wet. Imagine if we consummated it? Well, it's a long story but at the beginning there were other people in both our lives that we were considering to have an affair. He told me he wasn't interested in her. So we get even closer the last few months and I find out tonight he had a date with her last week and they sucked face. It slipped out because of something that had happened but he really wasn't going to tell me. So, what happened to I don't want to have an affair? Reality is, he doesn't want to have an affair with me. And, our friendship was also rocked. I can't stand people who say "Well I didn't lie, I just didn't tell you". To me that is lying. And then it got ugly!

So I flipped. I take friendship really seriously. Well their are friends and then there are true friends. And if you are my true friend, I will do anything in this world for you (I have 5 of those). And they would do anything for me. And sadly, my husband is not in that category. But my soulmate, my buddy, my podcasting partner was. I could tell him anything. He made me laugh, he was smart in business and I trusted his recommendations. The things I would have done with him. The experimenting that I fantasized about. I truly loved him for the person he is. So, tonight ladies and gents, I feel played and a fool. The first time since I was a young girl. And it hurts a lot. Not even losing the hot sex thing we would have had....but that connection. I really want to make a joke here, but I am too sad tonight. Maybe tomorrow. I don't think I will be able to find another soul mate (it only took me 40 years to find this one). Well, I am going to cry a little and lick my wounds. And hopefully tomorrow will be a better day....Sweet Dreams Everyone!

"LIAR-I Will Not Drown If You Take It Out"

Yes, this is my mood tonight and I don't want to bore you with a negative post. So I figured I would give you a laugh on a cartoon that has a deeper meaning!
The Big Question: Why do men always seem to do what is best for them and try so hard to convince you its what is best for you? Even Charlie Brown is a DOG!! I didn't even know he had a penis!
Sweet and wet dreams!

Feeling Like A Cat Scratcher

Boy Toy emailed me back a fantasy. It's not his fault, we were discussing liking massages. Unfortunately, his fantasy sounded like my sex life that exists at home now. So needless to say, I was totally not into it. You see, I feel like a cat scratcher at home. Never do I get a backrub without the payback being sex expected. So as soon as the hub starts to rub my back...I can start to feel his hard on right up against me. It's like clockwork. So, I picture myself as a cat scratcher with him using me to hump against. Granted he does get it most of the time but I cringe because its so predictable. For once I would love my back rubbed without feeling like a cat scratcher. Okay, is it obvious that the hub and I are not on good terms today? Probably because I end up doing everything that most men do around the house and I am furious with him. I have a Barbie Doll tool kit that I use....it's totally pink.hammer, screwdriver, tape measure, utility knife..it's great. Actually my hot builder (who 2 years ago sexually woke me up) gave it that name. All right, desperate housewives is going on and I am going to relax in my tub and watch it. (One day I'll have to tell you about my tub--it's better than sex!) I know now that I posted this----tonight will be a cat scratcher night!

An Addiction to the CyberPersonals

I admit it! I am addicted. It's so tempting when I see the you have mail. Am I suppose to ignore it? Every once in awhile I go back to the sites to see if I have mail. Most of the time, since my plate is so full right now, I just delete the messages..too old, too short, into threesomes. But then every once in awhile there is one that interests me. This one was from a guy who is looking for a girl who is or wants to be a member of the Mile High Club AND the Book of the Month Club. Well, I always wanted to be a memver of the Mile High Club (still one of my fantasies) and I have my own book club and love to read (www.rendezvousradio.com) I have Cheri's Book Club. Of course, he's not talking about those types of books but you never know!
So, I emailed him back, told him right off the bat that I have a full plate right now but his profile was interesting. Well he emailed back with a pix and he is adorable. The most dreamest blue eyes....kind of reminds me of #1...the first guy I ever met from the online married personals. He was delicious. His penis was not very thick but he had these sexy lips and this calm air about him. Always honest and to the point. All right enough about #1, he got relocated with his job and well I thought it was best that we didn't do it. So we just fooled around and swore we would hook up again before we were too senile to remember each other.
So back to the new guy--the potential is there. I'll keep you updated. He used to be in a band..so I guess his nickname will be Band Man.

Hornier Than Usual?

Chris says that I am hornier than usual lately. Well what does he expect? I am researching sex, affairs and fetishes every night for our website and podcast. So Yes, I am hornier than usual. Sex is all around and I am not getting it!
So last night, Chris decided to give me a little treat. We webcam once in awhile. Well, he webcams and I watch and "IM" him while he's doing his thing. I never imagined that just watching someone would turn me on. but I guess that I imagine us being together or my mouth over his cock. For me, I enjoy when he cums and I see him cum on the webcam.
I'll tell you (and he'll probably kill me) but he's got a cock he can be proud of. He's got the length but its the thickness that really does it for me. So, of course, I went to sleep with visions of Chris' penis in my head. Certainly didn't subside my horny feelings...I tossed and turned all night!
It's funny, I know Chris stops by my blog once in a while and reads it. It's strange because none of you know me but he does. I felt strange when I wrote about us at first "My Soulmate, My Buddy" and most guys probably would have freaked. His response, "Honey, I knew that all already". So, I feel comfortable enough with him to know my inner thoughts. And, it saves me time telling him about the other guys I'm meeting online. Ironically, Chris wants me to be happy and feels I should experience others as well. Personally, I think that if Chris and I ever actually did it, it would be the ultimate affair. The physical chemistry is there, the trust, the connection. I feel totally comfortable with Chris and not self conscious at all. I wouldn't hesitate to say "let's try anal, or I don't like that or tie me up". How often do you find someone that you feel 100% comfortable to say anything to and would trust to make all your desires come true?" It also helps that we have discussed many of our experimental desires so we wouldn't even have to say much...just go with it. So, who knows. Only time will tell. I think he's avoiding coming out to see me because the inevitable will eventually happen when we are face to face. I doubt it, but who knows, maybe its been so long, we will see each other and the spark will be gone. Only time will tell I guess!

Booty Caller Is Wearing Me Down!

Just when I forget about him, Booty Caller comes seaping back into my emails! He is that 6'4", suave, bad, cocky, vain, hot body, good looking guy that you know is trouble. He knows how to play the game and he knows exactly how to bait me. We both are control people and his emails know exactly how to get a rise out of me. Damn! He invited me to the hotel by his office and I told him no. He says I'm going to breakdown but I plan on staying strong (that cocky, conceited hot bastard). Yes, I admit the sex would be so intense and raw. and yes, I haven't had that in many, many years. I keep picturing him on top of me, with those broad shoulders and him just screwing my brains out and and of course doggie style for that deep penetration that I can't resist. No emotion, nothing but pure, raw, intense sex. But while during, I would absolutely love it. I have a feeling afterwards, I would regret it. I think that's not the way to officially cheat for the first time. I think Chris or Mr. Government are better choices. Any thoughts?

Head Games

Side Note - Head Games
I'm so not into head games. I think they are such a waste of good energy. You want something, you go for it. Plain and simple. You want to do someone, they want to do you....life can be so simple. I haven't always felt that way..In fact, I was very good at head games when I was younger. (I've had certain life experiences that actually have changed my way of thinking about life).

Boy Toy and Mr. Government were busy text messaging and emailing today. I'm definitely more into Mr. Government. I like power and his boyish smile is turning me on. And Mr. Government has awaken from his shy little approach. He's starting to swim in that cheating ocean..working with those tides of passion. He had me laughing so hard, I asked him if there were any preferences or order to his profile desires. He responded that he was going to hold me to mine or file a complaint of false advertising.

Well I guess it's the weather but I am just super horny tonight. Did I ever tell you that my favorite position is Doggie Style? Well, the hubby is certainly going to get lucky tonight. I need to release all this sexual tension. I guess all this affair talk is helping the sex in my marriage! A nice massage and some doggie style sex and I should sleep like a baby! Wet dreams all!

The Cheaters Amongst Us

Went to a dinner party tonight with 10 neighborhood couples. Funny how you look at things differently when you are seriously contemplating an affair. The men go watch sports, the woman chat in the kitchen over some wine. Caught up on some neighborhood gossip. Who is supposedly doing who, who is getting divorced and who had their boobs and tummy tucks done. Don't forget the kids sports gossip. Ironically, the one woman who had the biggest opinion on the matter, is the one whose husband is doing his secretary and has hit on almost everyone in the room.

I sat very quietly and just listened. My girlfriend (and partner in crime) just shot me a look every once in awhile. The subject of sex of course came up. Conclusion, everyone was rarely doing it. Boredom, tired, too busy, not worth the time were basically the reasons. Big mouth was the only one who was having sex on a regular basis and it was still wonderful (if she only knew where her husband's cock was, she would die). I so wanted to tell her ,as did every other woman in that room. She ranted how horrible it is for a woman to even think of another man and went on and on about marriage vows. Finally I asked her...don't you ever wonder what another mans lips feel like after all these years? Of course, she said absolutely not! BUT, everyone else in the room agreed with me. My girlfriend choked on her wine...I couldn't help it. I was wondering if I had been the only one. Well, the conversation continued to the missing spark (which I sat back quietly and just sipped my wine) and well, I'm convinced another one of my friends is having an affair. It was the look she gave me. This underlying connection that just said it. I could see that spark in her eye, that grin on her face..it is a cheaters grin, it was those Lyin' Eyes. I went over to her later as we both were cleaning up the table and asked her, so do I know him? "No, I wouldn't do any of the guys in this neighborhood!" We just both laughed! I'm glad she didn't ask me...honestly, I would have lied and felt bad. But her secret is safe with me.

Doing Men In Double

My whole life I have found men in double. Like two "Johns". two "Petes", two "Andys" etc. etc. In fact, the two guys (one I married, one I lived with) that I were the closest too also have the same name. In fact, the two men who were both amazing at eating me out had the same name too. So is this something that is coincidence or is there some deep meaning to this? I bring it up because it's happening again. The two men closest to me right now (both who I will sleep with) have the same name. So, what is this all about?

Hmm..Mr. Government May Have A Wild Side

Well I sent a little flirty note to Mr. Government on the online site that we met on. Just saying that "You sound like a guy who might like a Tall Latte"..we should meet for coffee!" And he sent back "You sound like a venti latte girl that is very sexy, an amazing smile and really soft lips. We should meet again for a coffee. What do you think?" Of course, I wrote back...saying we should find a quieter place for coffee next time.

Such stupid little flirting over coffee but it did put a smile on my face all day today. Like that crush when I was a kid. So who knows, maybe Mr. Government is not just a suit but a wild man underneath that exterior.

I was a little spooked that everytime I check my mail, they send out emails that I am online. I didn't know that. It's like those guys can keep track of me...I understand that's to keep the guys interested but I find it very unnerving that everytime I go to the site (even though I am in Do Not Disturb mode) they are informed that I am there. Now I get this "1984"Big Brother is watching you feeling everytime I sign on...

Missing! One Podcast Partner

MISSING! ONE PODCAST PARTNER!

Last scene two months ago. He has a sexy smile, amazing charisma and is extremely well endowed! He answers to the names Honey, Sweetheart, Shithead, Bastard, and Chris. He has a warped sense of humor and really can be a pain in my ass (literally). If you talk dirty to him, he will get this huge bulge in his pants that is certainly worth exploring. If found, please return him to this blog so Cheri can take him to a sleazy hotel, screw his brains out and then work on the podcast with him. All leads are welcome!

Mr. Government, Boy Toy, Booty Caller

Today was an action packed day--so why do I feel so blah? Probably because I felt old today. An action packed day of younger men. Actually, the morning began with Booty Caller again...Admitting that he was just afraid to get emotionally attached (hence no kissing, no hugging). I told him it was nice to see that he was a human being but I certainly can't get involved in that. Sure, go into a no passion lay relationship. No way!

Boy Toy is hysterical! Okay, I feel like a grandmother. He is trying to convince me his threesome fantasy means nothing and that he keeps fantasizing about me lying naked with him in front of the fireplace rubbing oils all over me (I am a sucker for massages) . Now, get this...his wife is 23 years old! Yes 23! Let's see, what was I doing at 23. I was screwing around, climbing the corporate ladder, partying every night, enjoying life. That was many kids ago.....many lifetimes ago. And I won't even get into a 23 year olds body!! Ever hear of the pencil test? I had the most perkiest tits at that age. They stood up like good little soldiers. My ass was tighter than a drum and my waist wasn't bigger than a 22. Okay I have been told I am still a hot babe, I turn men on but 23?! Too weird for me. I am 17 years older than his wife. I was probably getting laid the day she was born! What is that all about?!?

And Mr. Government. We met today and had coffee. I know I keep saying it but he really is a gentleman. He was so nervous and he kept blushing like a little boy. IT was sweet. Then came the good by. For the first time, it was awkward....so I just kissed him (a peek...slow down cowboy, don't let your mind go wild). He blushed so that I did it two times more. He asked me if I wanted to go for coffee again. How cute! He's definitely a breath of fresh air. I am not sure we will get anywhere though. His job is not conducive to affairs. It's not Bill Clinton or a real high power politician but we really would have to be discreet (out of respect for him and the fear my site will be shut down-lol) Okay, enough with this dating BS. I'm sure you are as bored as I am.....we need to push one of these affairs to the next level already! I'm coffeed out!

I am Gloating! Booty Call emailed

I don't remember when it was (and I'm too lazy to look back) but I said that Mr. Booty Call was going to email me back within two weeks. Well, I was wrong. It only took a weekend . He emailed me that he was in Home Depot and he saw an industrial package of batteries and thought of me. I responded that it was such a romantic gesture on his part and see you are a caring person. What a great gift! He wants to know about my toys...I told him that too bad he wasn't into shower and baths, my toys are waterproof and would give a new meaning to a bath! He was dying, I can tell. I told him to go find some fun and think about me and what a little hugging could have gotten you. He still held on until I told him I had two meetings this week. Don't think he wanted to hear that but his cocky attitude deserved a cocky attitude back. Guaranteed...I'll hear from him within the next two weeks! Start the timer again!

Mr. Government and I are actually meeting tomorrow. He seems like a really, really nice guy and he is really cute. I'm not sure but he might be a little too conventional for me, but we will see. He's been such a gentleman so far, not even a little fantasy. He thinks I am very cute and funny. Isn't that sweet! I make him smile. And then there is Boy Toy. He is 32 (I told you about him). We are talking tomorrow and meeting later in the week. He knows about my others and he was the one who said "stop going for the booty caller type when your boy toy would treat you like the lady you are". So, it seems like I may have two nice guys here. Time will tell won't it! Will I ever have that extramarital affair? I am absolutely the worse cheater. How pathetic! Truth, I don't want to sleep around just for the hell of sleeping around I want the passion! I'll probably scare the crap out the guy when I finally ravage him!

Of course, then there is Chris. Ironically, he is probably the perfect extramarital affair for me BUT that's a story for another night. Actually, that's something that Chris can answer better since I still don't get it. Maybe I'll have him on as a guest blogger on my blog. So Chris, why haven't you and Cheri hooked up? So Chris, why do you want Cheri to keep looking ? So Chris, when are you going to let her take you to that other world of no return? I think about Chris and I doing it sometimes. And I have no doubt that it would be electrifying! In fact, next time I'll have to share our first encounter together (let's just say I got a preview of what he has to offer---and I was impressed)! Wet Dreams All!

The Nicknames

I got an email asking if these guys knew I was doing this. Well, the answer is no...(except for Chris-My Bud and Soulmate). But, if they ever found this blog, they would know it was them right away. I actually have called them by their nicknames so while the names have been changed to protect the guilty...the nicknames are names I have actually called each one of them. And obviously, they would recognize the interaction since they were there! So Soldier Boy, Boy Toy, Shrinky Dink, Mr . Personal Trainer, Mr. Government, Mr. Booty Call...would probably freak if they came to my blog. Oh well! Ce la vie!

Approved then Denied From Link2Blog & The Stalker

Well I'm kind of upset today. I was approved for Link2Blog and then my approval was taken away. I sent in a request to see why....I felt like they were judging my morality here. I can't imagine why else they would not allow me on the search engine.. they have escorts, people vomitting, bondage and other things that, while I don't like to judge, I can't see how my desires and thoughts to have an affair was too much for them? I don't know, I'll let you know their comments....I just had to vent.

Did I tell you about my stalker that I had. This is why you have to be careful on the sites. Another Cut Out complex type of guy who knew really nothing about me, never saw me and then he is convinced I am the one for him. Went back to the online married site, I was using for the first time in a long time to actually look something up. I had to click on my profile for literally 4 minutes and wouldn't you know...the stalker found me. He must have me still marked, so when I signed on, he got an email or something...man that is scary. Three seconds later, I got an email from him telling me how much he missed me etc, etc. and we have to meet. Well I told him I found someone and we are really happy. Hopefully, he will get the message. He still wants a pix and told me he will always be there for me. That weirds me out.

So Cheri's word of advice for the day --Here is a pure example of why both women and men need to be careful whether you are married or single.-you really never know who is on the other end and how stable they are.

Tossing and Turning In My Bed

Every once in awhile, I get the urge to write a poem. I feel this inspiration overcome me and I just start writing...tonight was one of those nights so I figured I'd share it...It's actually posted on my website. It's very corny but hey, it's from the heart (or it's a combination of the horny and romantic side of me)...Good Night!
www.rendezvousradio.com/funwithme.htm

You have dysfunctional men in your Mailbox!

It's ironic...Saturday night and the clock hits 12:45AM..the wives must have just gone to sleep and the husband's didn't get it because my mailbox begins to fill up! I am working on my blog and my computer keeps dinging with new mail. A sign of a bad Saturday night at home! I noticed it last Saturday too! Yes, I am on the computer so much. Between work and some other projects, I sometime think my butt is permanently attached to this seat.

Mr. Booty Call contacted me again today....he needed to say that he agreed we were not suitable...sarcastically, I told him that if I wanted a meaningless booty call that I would call him. He told me that I was hot, he's dying to get into my pants and I should just say the words. Hell would have to freeze over before I would go to him. Now, he was hot but his ego was certainly bigger than his genitalia (I'm assuming). Guaranteed I'll hear from him with two weeks!

Mr. Government and I are playing phone tag....he sounds like a nice guy, he's cute but I don't think he's wild enough for me. I'm looking to experiment , I'm looking for a little edge, I'm looking for the earth to move...I'm looking for multiple orgasms. Sigh!

So Chris, if you read this post (which I know you sometimes take a peak even though I told you not too)....It's time we just had that intense session that I know we are both thinking about! I know the podcast, the soulmate, the friendship thing.....HONEY...Just Rock My World!

Fishing for a Booty Call

My conclusion today--all men are #@!#ing assholes. I'm sorry, it's a horrible generalization but it's amazing that they are created by woman. The idiot I told you about who said his marriage was great and I recommended a prostitute (thought he was nice)...well I met him for coffee. He was hot! He was really tall, blonde, built amazing and extremely unique in his suave email approach. His conclusion, he wants a girl to give booty calls like in college. You know that drunk night when you just go to some low self esteem girls house who you know likes you and you do her and don't even acknowledge her the next day. He's not into kissing, not into holding, no shower together...it sounds like "leave the money on the dresser on the way out".
Well Mr, Booty Caller do I have news for you! How dare you even think to consider me for that category! Honey, I am honest for what I am looking for because I am not going to settle. You want (and try) to control me, oh boy, you have no idea what you would be in for . I am independent, actually a rebel. I like to walk on the line...you could not control me sweetie. I do as I please. The passion, the lust, the sex...I can guarantee (as you agreed) we would be hot together. Your email after, how I made you feel tingles just from when my hand touched your hand. Can you imagine what my mouth would do to you?

So Mr. Booty Caller, I was first tempted to lasso you in and break you just for the fun of it. But you're not worth the energy. I admit, it would be fun, one day of unforgettable sex and after, I would leave a dollar on the dresser for your services as I walked out. But, I'm not that much of a bitch anymore. Years ago, I would have loved the challenge and look forward to your expression at the finale, but I am not like that anymore and thankfully I still have my edge to see a guy like you coming. I feel bad for that nice woman who isn't going to see right through you!

Almost Got Busted--Time to Clean Up!

Well I was taught a lesson today...practice what you preach! I got careless and left some papers on my website around and my husband found them. Of course, Chris and I had just talked been talking an hour before on how I have to be more carefulan discreet (damn I hate when he is right and then he can gloat about it---he's probably still gloating right now!). Well it was thankfully a false alarm. He found it but just threw it on my desk and didn't read it (I did a careful interrogation without him realizing he was being interrogated--the Secret Agent in me I guess). So today is clean up day! Clean up my desk, my computer and I am going to re-read all my research on being a Smart Cheater today. Tune up on my cheating skills!

Starring: Boy Toy

I just realized that I never have written about "Boy Toy". "Boy Toy" is different than "Soldier Boy". And, Soldier Boy is totally gone. After much thought, there was too many downfalls to that one. It's not worth going into but breaking the first rule...being single. And the fact that he had his own place, might have been a positive but it was too convenient and collegy for me. College was 20 years ago and that's too far back for me to go.

So Boy Toy is 32 years old (I'll save you the time of the age difference- 8 years). He's hot, but he's looking for the threesome, the watching, the videotaping....all not for me. As you know, I'm a one on one type of girl. So we have just been friends. We email back and forth and he is just a really nice (And hot and younger) Boy Toy. We're going to meet for coffee (good thing I like coffee because I've been seeing a lot of Starbucks lately-lol). But I told him he should go with his fantasy. He says he's willing to give it up for me (hmm...he's sweet but we all know the truth). So I figured I'd just mention him since, he's going to be appearing in the future in some capacity.

My Knight In Shining Armor

Well it's been a couple of days...I have been working like crazy on the website and podcast. I can't wait for it to be up and running!! I'd love your opinion, go to www.rendezvousradio.com and let me know what you think.

Well, as you know I wanted to clean house and get rid of the men that I never thought have Knight In Shining Armor potential. I decided that I need to narrow down the search. A guy emailed me yesterday and he was looking for a physical relationship only and his marriage was great! I emailed back--thanks for the offer but no thanks--I am looking for more and let me recommend going to a prostitute to fulfill those sexual needs. The next thing I know we are in a back and forth conversation and he's a nice guy.....so this blow off turned into a potential. But wait, I am cleaning house...okay, I am researching for my podcast (I need to have true authentic different stories to keep you interested-right?!? lol)

Reality---I don't think any of the ones I have met so far are my Knight In Shining Armor (Chris is in a different category). I am not going to settle--I will keep looking and search for the right one! So I am still a virgin cheater and am still looking for the one to take my cherry (or would it be a plum the second time around or grape?) I want it to be intense, perfect and super hot. Its got to be with someone who I trust and like as a person and who I am attracted to. Chemistry and connection---so, I will continue to suck lots of face and touch lots of cocks until I see those sparks I guess!!